I cannot tell you have much I can’t stand the ‘non-apology’ apology. You know the one where the offending party really doesn’t feel they’re wrong so begin their apology with “Sorry, if…” We all know darned good and well that you’re not at all apologetic the moment you insert the word ‘if’. So, could someone please tell me what this is about and when it became acceptable?
Not too long ago I was at the shopping mall when this little heifer bumped into me with her backpack almost knocking me to the ground. The girl, in her mid-teens by all appearances, excitedly chatting away to her friends while flinging her hair and body this way and that. As I walked by this girl and her pack of four or five friends it happened: a flick of her head, then sharp sudden turn of her body and WACK!!! Her backpack knocked me directly into the path of another woman who was walking past.
I am not a grouchy person. I may be forty, but I was once a teenager. My teenage years weren’t so long ago that I don’t remember what it was like to get excited when hanging out with my friends. However, even then I knew how to give a sincere apology
Girl: “Like, OMG! I soooo didn’t see you there!!!” (giggle)
Me: “Pardon?” (dazed look of confusion)
Girl: “Geez! Like calm the frigg down okay! Like, I’m sorry if you’re upset that I bumped into you!!! My gawd!!!”
I am happy to say that the little wretch stomped-off after uttering her last words because I was praying for strength. I was praying for the strength to knock this child to Timbuktu which I understand is over a day’s travel by airplane as it’s located in Central Africa (if I am wrong about the location of this country, feel free to let me know).
Would it have killed the child to say ‘sorry’? She didn’t even have to use the words, “I am” in the apology. I would like to know why she thought giggling and cursing at me was appropriate. Actually, to be honest I’d like to know why she thought I should enjoy be battered by her bag. Yes, you read that last sentence correctly. I can only assume she thought I should have enjoyed being battered by her bag by her amazement that I should have the audacity to upset by what happened.
If I had had the chance to respond to this child I would not have accepted her apology due to the way it was offered. Among the more important things I’ve learned over the years it that I do not have to accept all apologies, especially when I don’t believe they are sincere. But, the more important thing I have learned is that if I’m wrong, regardless of whether I intended to offend the other party, I have to make my apologies and accept the consequences no matter how difficult or uncomfortable it might be.
Laters & Good Night,